I once asked a newspaper co-worker, a well-intentioned guy with conventional liberal ideals, what white folks got out of the Civil Rights Movement, hoping to challenge the assumption that Blacks were the only beneficiaries. I said a nation that opposes discrimination serves everyone better because no one's talents or contributions are stifled.
"I don't think I would have ever heard The Temptations or Four Tops, " he said.
If I had it to do over, I would not have challenged his response as naive. Rather I would have asked him to explain what he meant. Maybe he had a story about how music helped him lower boundaries between him and black classmates or how his father's music collection laid the groundwork for a conversation about race in his home. Sure, his thinking might have been as simplistic as it seemed but I would have given him space to speak his truth rather than assume I knew his truth.
I can't live that moment over but often I wish I could.
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